Positively Voltaic
Reporting from the War for the Whitehouse Bunker, Andrea Bennett and Jason Copland from The Onion News Network put up a voltaic front as they struggle to maintain their excitement while a copter circles overhead, marking the countdown to the 2012 election. Knocking back rumors that Ann Romney once had a lesbian affair, the Onion crew nevertheless drops a bombshell, finding that “The average American voter is a 36-year-old Hispanic man obsessed with trivia and filled with deep shame.”
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