Call Me Stormy

You’re All Racist Hypocrites!

Billie Eilish wins a Grammy and, like every celebrity who’s been applauded by strangers since age 14, decides this is the perfect moment to lecture everyone about borders, stolen land, and why ICE is bad.

Naturally, the internet hears “no one is illegal on stolen land” and responds with the only reasonable question: Cool, when do we get your house?

From Daily Mail headlines demanding she hand over her $3 million Los Angeles mansion, to a tribe politely saying “yeah… you didn’t actually ask us,” to reporters rocking up to her gated compound to test the no borders theory in real life — it all goes exactly how you’d expect.

We’ve also got Billie’s brother doing the Uno reverse hypocrisy routine, celebrities discovering they suddenly love borders when it’s their driveway, and a reminder that “abolish everything” sounds way better on a stage than it does at your front gate. LET’S GO!! Here’s more from Bearing.