I’m Back, Bitches!
Kamala Harris Wants Another Shot and It’s EMBARRASSING 💀
Kamala Harris is back — not officially, but back. She’s doing the media rounds, her superfans are pumping out AI campaign ads, and the word “2028” is starting to get thrown around. SugarTits and I could not be happier, because the last time Kamala Harris ran against Donald Trump it produced some of the funniest political content in living memory, and we’re here for the sequel.
We revisit the greatest hits of the 107-day campaign — the coconut tree, the electric school buses, “unburdened by what has been,” the wine-drunk speech energy, and the Biden debate meltdown that got the baton passed to her in the first place. Then we dig into her recent Don Lemon interview, where she was asked a direct question and produced 1,512 characters of pure waffle that said absolutely nothing. We ran it through Claude to see if it could translate; the verdict was “stop talking, start doing,” and even the AI clocked it was 200 characters of content wrapped in 1,500 characters of packaging.
Then it’s on to the AI campaign ads from her fan accounts — the corporate-stock-footage “we rise together” masterpieces that say nothing at all, the “American Psycho would’ve been a better candidate” energy, and a nostalgic look back at the all-time-great “be a man, vote for a woman” ad from last cycle, complete with the immortal Steve Shives inserts.
LET’S GO!! Here’s more from Bearing.
